Of Stubborn Hands

On the rare occasions when I'm not emmersed in the business of being a mom, or hurrying from one place to another, I often have the privilage of just watching people. If I'm waiting to meet friends or family and find myself somehow alone in public, it gives the rare opportunity to simply slow down and observe. There are such a variety of people out there, even here in the 'burbs! (By the way, I am not fond of that phrase for some reason...who coined it, anyhow?) I often see parents with their children, young professionals sipping their lattes, folks going in and out of stores...and if I have nothing with me to read, watching people can be very educational and entertaining! Of course I try to be descreet...try not to stare. And sometimes I have had no intention of actually being a "people watcher"...but the situation just many times presents itself and there I am...watching people. They were there right in front of me and I had to keep an eye out for whomever I was waiting for anyway. Sometimes we have no choice except to watch people- and sometimes there are even lessons to be learned.

Now, I wish I could say that I had a phenomenal story to tell about some people I have observed. But it's usually the unassuming ones that many times grab my attention...

In fact, just this past Sunday we were making our weekly pilgrimage to Winco after church (for those not in Winco-land, it's pretty much a food warehouse where prices are cheap, but you stand in a long line whether you have a full cart or one loaf of bread- and of course you bag your grocieries.) Once we all got into line, and the girls were happily helping their daddy put the items up to be scanned, I decided to mosey outside to wait for them in the sunshine, near the exit doors. After seeing countless families file by, my eye caught sight of an older couple. He was slightly bent over, tall and frail looking, with an exquisitly beautiful Asian wife by his side. As he began picking up the two bags from their cart, I noticed how his wife tried to take one of the bags from him. Although he seemed to struggle somewhat, manuvering the second bag into his arms, he wouldn't relinquish it. I watched how his wife tried again, a worried look on her face, to take just one of the bags from him, but he haughtily insisted on carrying them both. She gave up, a still worried and frustrated look on her face as they walked past me...and my last glimpse was of the frail old man stubbornly clinging to his bags, one of them looking as though it could slip to the ground any minute. Yet, the look of concern on his wife's face had been clearly for him- not the bags. I wondered if perhaps something more specific than his age- perhaps a health problem- conctributed to her worry.
After they were out of sight, I wondered about them. How long had they been married? Did they have children? Was he always stubborn in his ways...or was he just holding tightly to the last of his independence as tightly as he held the grocieries?

Something about them had tugged at my heart. Perhaps it's the sometimes sad approach of age, when a once strong, robust and independent man finds the littlest tasks a struggle, and yet his pride yells out that he is still a man, still capable...still strong.
Or perhaps it was an all-too familair reflection of us all...how we, even those of us that love and follow Christ, can insist on trying to struggle with our own burdens, simply out of pride.

Tiny children, I've found, have the same characteristics...toddlers and preschoolers insist on wanting to "do it mytelf!" and then struggle and flounder...finally coming to us, their parents, for just a little help.

To this day, I still tend to want to "just figure things out on my own"- instead of first giving the whole thing over to the Lord, and leave it there. How many times has He been walking beside me, just as the older man's wife had been, a look of deep concern on His face, just waiting for me to give my burden into His waiting arms?

Fortuantely, we serve a faithful God...He won't give up on us, even when we're being stubborn and prideful. He loves us too much. He will continue to walk besides us...waiting as long as He has to before we finally hand over whatever weighs us down. Because no matter how well we think we can handle everything on our own, we might as well face it...we just can't. And why would we really want to, anyway?