My four year old cuddle-bug has become Miss Whiny, U.S.A. Oh, she's always been a runner-up in the pageant, but this month, I've officially crowned her the shining queen.
The other night, she fussed so much in the bath that her whine-voice refused to leave for the rest of the evening. Not getting her big, fluffy marshmellow which I promised for good bath behavior sent her even more over the edge. For the rest of the evening, the whines and hysteria were the background noise as I tried to dry and brush her hair (remember this
POST....?)
and they continued to serenade us as we readied for bed. Every few seconds, the cries were punctuated with, "I wanna marshmellow! Pleeeeeese can I have a marshmellow?"
Now, I'm not a heartless mama, but really, I just believe that when I warned her that if her behavior continued, she would lose on said-marshmellow...well, I just gotta' follow through! Believe me, my life would have been sooooo much easier if I would have given in!
She would beg, plead and wail..."I just got to ask you something!"
"Yes, I'm listening..."
"Oh, Pleee-eeease can I have a marshmellow?"
After about the 20th time of saying she just had to ask me something, I would then ask,
"Is this question going to be if you can have a marshmellow?"
She would slowly nod her head in defeat. Followed by an answer in the negative.
Followed by more wails.
This morning, there are no hysterics, but there is still that decidedly tone of "whine" to the voice. The kind that makes your muscles tense, your ears ring, and your mouth start to twitch as the listener.
"Where's my cup of milk? It was right here! Mommmm-mmmy!"
Believe me, I have tried all the great mommy lines.
"I cannot hear you when you speak like that."
"Please speak in a big-girl voice."
or the ever-popular,
"No marshmellows until you graduate from medical school!"
Yes, sometimes those actually do the trick. But other times there is no such luck.
Please, tell me I am not alone! Tell me there are other contestants in this lovely little pagentry of the Whines! Because some days I am wanting to put in some earrplugs and just go soak in Calgon for a few hours.
But then, just as I am about to head for the hills, she says, as she did just now while I was typing...
"Mommy?"
"Yes?"
"I love you, Mommy."
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15 comments:
Bless both of your hearts!! Is she getting overtired perhaps? I know sometimes you have some pretty activity packed weekends. Though it was hard, good for you for sticking to your word about no marsmellow, & aren't those I Love You Mommy the most beautiful words?
ruth
Oh ho ho! My oldest can be terrible about this. I usually just tell him he must be very tired and needs to go back to bed. That usually nips it in the bud, lol!
Both mine did this and still do. My younger one was more whiny, and the older one was a little more demanding.
Nearly did me in one day when my older one (3 yrs old) said "Mama, pleeeeeeeease. I'll be you's best fwend!" I had to turn my back so she couldn't see me laughing.
I finally got to where I would tell them "If you don't want "No" for an answer, then ask a different question."
I feel your pain. It got so bad this weekend that I finally sent her to her room until she could ask for something without whining. Drives me crazy!
My son, Jaden is the biggest whiner in the house and I TOTALLY know what that's like - AARRGGHHH!
I think you did the right thing sticking to your guns. I know how hard that is. I need to practice that more.
Oh, I am so glad she isn't the only contestant! Thank you, thank you!
I think I needed to vent a bit! As much as we love our children, there are definately those times that we that we just want to jump a ship to Bermuda!
Other times, we just want to cuddle them and savor the moments! Ahhh, motherhood!
Too funny...laughing out loud with recognition over here. I've got an 11 year old but she could probably still give your little one a run for her money. And I certainly recognize all those responses...too bad they start to lose their meaning and value as the kids grow up!
You're absolutely right to stick to your word. Needing Mom's focussed attention might be causing some of the whineyness. You have a great attitude!
oh, i've been there!!!
just stick with it and don't give in... it might make it "easier" that time but the next time it's only harder on you. because when you give in they know you've got a breaking point and they'll just carry on longer and louder the next time. consistency is key!:) and then one day (and it might be many months away), you'll realize that all the crazy drama has ended. and then you know you've both won!:)
Well, that last line of hers will get you every time, won't it? I guess I'm repeating something you already know and have tried but when mine hit the whiney stage, I used the "I can hear you when you whine" thing on them and it worked. Whining stopped. Neither of mine were ever really whiners but when I first noticed the signs, I nipped it in the bud.
Ahhh, the memories. You did right though. You may have made it easier to have given her the marshmellow right then and there, but you'd be paying for that for the next 15 years! We all know at least one indulged teenager!
My daughter used to whine. I'd say "I would love to hear what you have to say, and I find myself tuning out when I hear whining"...she eventually caught on. She's now 20...only whines occasionally now! LOL.
I have a couple champion whiners. Last night I was teasing two of my boys. I told one he was my meanest child and the other he was the whiniest and I then said, "Eeny, meanie, whiney, moe". Unfortunately I couldn't figure out which children I could link to eeny and moe.
Tammy,
Thanks for your comment on my Older Parent (revealing my age) post!
I'm with you, some of the younger parents I see in Snuggle Bug's play groups are starting to look like teenagers to me! Maybe they are teenagers. :)
Thanks for sharing your perspective on this subject. I do appreciate it!
thanks for the visit to my site!!! i had to read your post you referred to...been there done that... still doin' it!!! :)
i believe in sticking to your guns (wow that sounded powerful) but i am guilty of giving in. however, your conversation about the marshmellow - sounds like some i have around here with a certain 5 yo little boy!!! :)
but then the i love you mommy comes along and somehow - it's all been worthwhile!!! :)
I haven't experience too much of the whining just yet, I'm sure it is to come although I do get the saucy, arms crossed, foot stamping episodes.
And those marshmellows. Leelee would eat them for breakfast if I let her!
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