In the interest of perhaps helping a few others along the way, I'm going to be brutally honest.You know the old saying... never do a home renovation without expecting to pay for marriage counseling afterwards? Well, the same can be said for having yard sales. Or...at least having them with a certain guy whom will remain nameless (but suffice it to say that he's kinda' cute, loves Fox News, and shares my last name.)
This un-named man... normally a mild-mannered gentleman by week-day... turns into ...
THE GUY WHO WOULD SELL EVERYTHING!!!
You can run...you can hide...but still he'll seep into the smallest crevices of your home and garage... finding those precious keepsakes, tossing them onto the driveway...slapping those price tags on. He may say he is merely putting them out for your approval, as he superglues the "Make Offer" sign on your box of elegant Christmas dishes...but don't be fooled.
OK...maybe I'm exaggerating just a tad. But let me also suggest humbly to my readers (all eight of you) that something sinister comes over my beloved whenever we are having a yard sale. And the syndrome is growing progressively worse.
It wasn't always this way. There was a time, long, long ago...two newlyweds would have a little harmless yard sale at their Virginia apartment...sit side by side...read...laugh...just generally hoop it up and get along like lovebirds.
Nobody knows quite what happened, but somehow along the way, the happy yard sale hormone began leaving his brain. Today, I knew he has run out.
Well, I do have to be honest. Maybe...just maybe mind you...we both got up on rather the wrong side of the bed this morning. Maybe the high humidity in our usually cool northwest caused the flair of tempers.
(Personally, I think it's because he swore off all coffee last year. But that's a whole 'nuther post.)
And granted, having a few things in storage, hanging from the rafters, and up in the make-shift attic might make him a little anxious to be rid of some stuff. Believe me, I want to unclutter as much as the next gal...but, with within reason. My reason.
Alright, so I inherited the "keep" gene from my dear mother. But only- like- half of her gene. Whenever I do yard sales with my mom, who wants to sell her house and move closer...well, the shoe is on the other foot. In her eyes, I turn into...
THE DAUGHTER WHO WOULD SELL EVERYTHING (...so she can move out, sell her place, and live the remainder of her years contentedly near her granddaughers without paying for storage, I tell ya!.)
I knew you all would appreciate this sort of public service announcement, however.
If your normally stable marriage displays any of the following yard sale symptoms, beware:
*When discussing the possible price of various items, whether the hide-a-bed or vaccuum, all of his answers to you are $1.
*Normally sweet and kind, hubby suddenly uses sarcasm for no apparent reason about breakfast and marking pens. (Don't ask.)
*You resort to bringing up the dreaded "broken-motorcyle-taking-up-residence-for-11-years" subject with equal sarcasm. Not good.
*You write a post about it all...start to feel guilty about it...consider deleting it. Then realize that it's just Yard Sale Syndrome and your husband will get a good laugh about it all when he turns back into Clark Kent.
So, now that I've totally vented over my poor, defenseless hubby... let me assure you that I still love him dearly. My husband can be one of the sweetest guys to ever walk the planet. (Just read any of my previous posts!)
And I know what you're thinking... it's not fair to give my side of our little yard-sale-gone-bad without letting him have his say. But I'm hoping those of you that either know me- or are getting to know me- will understand that this is all said with humor and love.
And I do have to admit...in day to day life, I am not always the perfect saint. (No, it's true! I know it's hard to believe, but just trust me on this!)
And at the end of the day, all will be fine. Because if we can't laugh about these little things, then those "little things" can fester and build. Like something that's been in your fridge too long. (Not that I know anything about that.)
So, in order to preserve loving harmony in our relationship, I have decided to no longer do yard sales with my beloved. As with anything in life, you just have to know your limitations. What pitfalls to avoid in the future.
And guess what? The financial success of our yard sale was just plain sad. And I know it was because with all the bickering, God just couldn't really put His blessing on our endeavor. I know others may have other theological opinions on such things, but I really believe this.
On the lighter side, my husband just called. (Yes, he went to go work on his brother's car and to take the girls to McDonald's.
(To quote The Odd Couple openning..."This request came from his wife.")
And I have to say...just being away from the yard sale and having his mechanical therapy has given him back his sweet Clark Kent voice. I kinda' like him again.
And he is so secure that I actually have his blessing to post this. Maybe's he's OK with me revealing that we don't have the perfect family 365 days out of the year- that even wonderful husbands and wives don't always act so... wonderful. (Or maybe is going to start his own blog and is just planning his evil response...)
Actually, we both kind of knew when we spoke on the phone just now that all is forgiven.
And that's one of the very good things about our marriage...even when one of us- or both- are being rather jerky, we can forgive each other, learn something, and go on.
Oh, we still can be like lovebirds and enjoy togetherness...but from now on, I'm solo-ing in my career as a yard sale mama. And I think my sweet husband is just plain fine with that idea. Well, more like... relieved.
Perhaps, estatic might be more accurate.
So there you have it. The whole sorted details. I hope you learn from our mistakes and heed the warnings a bit better than we did. At least we learned something...better late than never!
(And if anyone wants a broken motorcyle, just let me know. It doesn't run...but it's kind of pretty, really blue and...well....BIG.)
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28 comments:
You're very brave to do yard sales at all! We've done - um, three, maybe only two - in our almost 24 years of marriage, and one was while he was away in the Gulf War. Yard sales are nerve-shattering for me, so we give away, throw away, and donate, but never sell!
Heh-heh. Sounds quite familiar!
I agree with Laura. You're brave to even do a yard sale. We've done two in our 28 year marriage. No arguing involved at all. All that happened really was that as I was taking every single thing we owned out to the front yard, hubby and daughters were carrying things back in. No fighting at all. Just a lot of everyone walking in and out of the house carrying stuff and a LOT of confused people trying to figure out what we were selling and what we weren't. WAY too much exercise. I'll never do another one!
LOL! Great post!
The few yard sales we've had are about the opposite, Hubby can never find anything to get rid of, and I can go overboard. He never sticks around for them, though.
Yes I admit I have 28 years of accumulation of things in my home to get rid of here before I can move. However I hope you have made some room for that Ping Pong Table & a few other miscelanious items still stored at dear old moms. I blame my pack rack tendencies from my 30s Depression Years & the shortages from WW (Well I have to blame something)
ruth
Yes I admit I have 28 years of accumulation of things in my home to get rid of here before I can move. However I hope you have made some room for that Ping Pong Table & a few other miscelanious items still stored at dear old moms. I blame my pack rack tendencies from my 30s Depression Years & the shortages from WW 2(Well I have to blame something)
ruth
Oops double posted, but I left out the 2 after World War 2. There was two of them ya'll & I was a teenager during the second one.
Any marriage that can withstand yardsales, wall-papering, back-to-school clothes shopping for the children, etc...well, those are marriages that are going to last :)
But after 13 years of marriage, there are just somethings I do on my own.
I wish my husband was more like that. He will not get rid of anything! It drives me crazy!
Thanks for the warning! I've been thinking about having a yard sale, but you reminded me how much I really really can't stand them. I've had two of my own, and my mom used to have them all the time. I didn't make any money on mine, but my mom used to do pretty well.
My hubby would rather just take everything to the dump. I'd rather give away the decent stuff. Already we're in a position to compromise. We just have to do it. But no yard sales! Crisis averted! Tell Clark we said thanks. (to both of you) :-)
okay, so no yard sales with the hubby.
Don't clean the garage either.
Or the closet
or the attic
or the trunk of my car.
Hi, just hunting for new friends...!
Mom, you know I love you, too! And to think, you and I are going to have another yard sale together in a few weeks!
:)
(And oh, no...the Ping Pong Table!)
Oh yeah. I've got the "keep" gene from my dad. And hubby would rather toss it all out. He'll be trying to get rid of stuff and I go and pick it out of the "garbage" can.
Yard sales... I don't know. Done a few and that's not been too bad.
Yes, yard sales and marriage. Next time just give to Goodwill or Freecycle.com. It just isn't worth it. My friend also started to Ebay her stuff!
Sea Monkey Part 1-
http://this-aint-new-york.blogspot.com/2006/08/this-is-what-my-life-has-come-to.html#links
AND, thanks for stopping by! :>)))
I always love to see your little girl on the phone!
LOL loved this post...been there, done that too! lol We did yard sales for years but the last few years we just give everything away to the charity shop...making yard sales is too much work for me now...must be getting old! lol
LOL, I enjoyed reading this post. :-) My husband put a moratorium on yard sales because ever since we've lived here we've never made any money at having one. I think the last sale we had (six years ago or so) we made a whopping $6! Yes, $6. My husband said it was too much work for so little money and that you have to buy lots of stuff in order to make money and we buy most of our stuff used to begin with so it was all fruitless. We now give most of our stuff to a local thrift store and some large items we've given to Freecycle.
Glad to hear you made it through. I, on the other hand, love having yard sales. I have the opposite problem with my husband though, he's got those keep genes coming out his ears!
That was a really neat post thanks for sharing.
Char
And $1?
We're just the opposite around here. Husband is the one who wants to keep everything because, and I quote, "They don't make those anymore!" Ugh.
And I'm laughing that you brought up the line from The Odd Couple! lol!
Tammy, Thanks for commenting on my site! I love this post - mainly because it is eerily familiar. You've caught my blog at the end of summer and I'll be winding down a bit for the fall (back to school and work...ugh). But I'll be back to visit you - I'm a b.i.g. lurker! So be ware.
LOL! My husband has the "keep" gene and I certainly don't. It's one of the few things that causes some occasional tension in our marriage :)
Hi there! Thought I'd answer the question you left in my comments - people change their blog names all the time. Long as the url doesn't change, it doesn't make a bit of difference. It did seem odd to me that you're from the northwest and called it a pretty southern expression but I understand that better now! Yeah, changing your blog name's all legal and everything. Family Doin's has kind of grown on me though. :-)
SO funny! You are a brave woman!!
Jennifer R.
I hate doing yard sales and just about refuse to do them today...would rather give the stuff away. What is disgusting is when you put your treasures outside they are perceived by others as junk. Oh well. You are brave to even do one of those "thangs"....
I like your blog title. Thanks for your comment on mine. I like that you associated motherhood with the rocking chairs. I left that out, didn't I?
Hi Tammy!! Thanks for stopping by my blog! We're considering homeschooling our boys starting next year. Right now I'm working a full time job but will be quitting here in the next few months b/c my husband and I will be planting a church together. It's all really exciting!
Thanks again for stopping by and hope to see you around more :) Psstt...I LOVE yard sales, but I can't STAND doing them :)
We just donate our stuff to Goodwill or Sally Ann or whatever. It saves a lot of hassle, and it is a form of giving.
Very funny!!
After my last yard sale, I swore I would NEVER do another one. It is just too much stress! I don't have a garage where I can presort and price, so all that stuff has to get piled in my house and then shifted out to the yard at 5 a.m. And there is always the threat of rain...
Thank goodness for Goodwill, Salvation Army and other such places.
And thanks for reminding me I need to get up in my attic and start tossing...when the weather gets cooler, that is!
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