Worth Waiting For

Barb at A Chelsea Morning suggested writing about how we met our spouse. So this is our story...


Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to be married and have children. And if that wasn't enough, I was a hopelesss romantic, as well. So, when my friends began to find serious relationships and pair off one by one, in their early 20's ...and yet I remained alone, I began to feel a profound sadness. Yes, I suppose I was feeling a bit left out. But it was more than that. I seemed to pine for "that certain someone" whom I had not yet met. I could almost feel that "in love" emotion, but it was attached to an invisible guy out there...somewhere.

Oh, I dated. In my 20's, I sort of bloomed late, and began dating several different guys (usually one at a time!) from my church single's group. I sometimes had "feelings" for a few of them. But still, they just weren't right, for one reason or another. I still hadn't met..."him".
People would say, "You're so pretty! I can't understand why you're not married yet!" As if the two things automatically went hand in hand.

As time went on, I began to suspect some of my friends' concerns were based on fact. Maybe I was too picky? Maybe I was just in love with love.

So, when a sort of dry spell occured in my dating life, and no potential mates seemed looming on the horizons at church or anywhere else, I began to find my eyes lingering just a bit longer on the pages of the newspapers that posted dating ads. (Yes, you read that right. I was actually letting my eyes scan the dreaded lonely heart singles ads!)
At first, I read them out of amusement. It was facinating to read what people put in those things! Some made me laugh outright...some just made me cringe. After awhile, though, I found myself spending more and more minutes reading some of those ads "just for fun". Especially, the ones that stated, "Christian man seeking...". And even better when they were between 28 and 38, relatively good-looking...and so on. I use to read them to a friend of mine over the phone (who was married and had toddlers) and we would giggle together over them all.

But one day, something clicked in my brain and I actually started dialing the phone. It was one of those setups where for a dollar or so, you can hear a voice message of your potential date, and if you like what you hear, leave one of your own. Well, the first time I did this was at the ripe old age of 28.
To make a long story short, I actually went out with two guys...the first, had a great little sports car, but was definately not my type at all in person.
The second one, was a divorced man with three children, who told me that his wife had wanted to get marriage counseling but he had refused. Um...that was the last date with that guy.

So with such wonderful luck such as this, I actually found myself being desperate enough -I mean willing- to pick up the phone again two years later when, during another "dry" dating period,I let my eyes peruse the dating section once more. There were a couple that really stood out...so I boldly called one and left a message. Then, I dialed again and heard one more voice message. Hmmm....he sounded nice. But his bio said he wasn't very tall...I'm use to dating tall men. But I am only 5"4 or so....
And even better still, he hasn't been divorced- like all the other 32 year old men I meet!

I started to hang up, but at the last minute, I decided to go ahead and finish listening. He does sound kind of sweet...if he's for real.
So, I left a message of my own- but not before honestly offering up a quick prayer. (I really did!)

Well, this guy that I almost hung up on called. He lived an hour away- and was a city boy. (I was a suburbs girl who always wanted to end up on a farm, milking cows.) We ended up talking on the phone for two hours...a stranger- yet we just sort of clicked, somehow. I remember hanging up, after we had arranged for a blind date on a Saturday night, thinking that if there turned out to be no chemistry between us in the romance department, I would really hope that at least he and I would become friends. Real friends.

The big day arrived. I was so nervous, but I was determined to play it cool. We had arranged to meet by one of the entry ways to a shop at the mall. It was a late afternoon in mid-August, 1993, but the summer skies had openned up and were letting down a torrent of pouring rain. Luckily, there was a nice shelter at the entryway while I waited. And waited.

And waited.

A young guy about 20 started chatting with me under the shelter as he waited for the rains to let up. He told me if this guy never showed up that I was waiting for, that I should go hang out with him. Flattered, I politely declined.

A half an hour or more went by...(yes, I pethetically still stood there...but I just didn't believe the guy I spoke with for two hours would stand me up) and just as I was thinking of going home, a small car inched in front of the shelter, the driver searching intently in my direction. I knew in an instant that it was him. I went over and asked his name and when we confirmed who we were. When I looked at him, it was as if I had known him all my life. And though I had safely planned on driving in my own car to the movies, I promtly just openned his door without thinking and hopped in! I would never do this ordinarily...I don't know what came over me! (Kids, please don't do this at home!)
He told me that he had been waiting at the entrance all this time...it had been the other entrance! We forgot to specify which entrance- so each of us had been standing on opposite sides, thinking that maybe we had possibly been stood up! Good thing, he decided to drive around slowly, before going home...

The movie we went to see was a new "date" movie called..."Sleepless in Seattle". Afterwards we went to dinner at a Mexican restaurant, and ended up talking very late into the evening. He told me a few days later that he was so nervous that night...and I could tell that he was, just a bit. But I still thought there was something incredibly special about him

Oh, and yes...though we didn't have our first kiss until the 5th date, I could tell that there was, indeed, that chemisty.

There would be some future snags along the way in our relationship and he actually joined the Navy and left me one year later. It was a crushing time. Add to that, his mother was dying and he had been layed off earlier from his job. But after several months of misery, we both realized we did not want to live with out each other and became engaged during Christmas break...sixteen months after that first blind date.

It may have not been in my timing, but God's timing was perfect. He brought me the desire of my heart. I had finally met that someone I had been waiting for. I had finally met... him.

Picture 1: About the time we were engaged
Picture 2: at my 40th birthday...he wore his sailor uniform for my "1940's" party.
Picture 3: 10th anniversary in Maui last year
(we he takes off his glasses, look out, honey!)
Picture 4: Our family this summer